We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
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