a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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