It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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