just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
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