I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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