I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize