Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
