bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
