By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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