trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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