Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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