I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
