Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
