At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"