Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here

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(416): View more from Ontario

i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones

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(303): View more from Colorado

then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins

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(256): View more from Alabama

You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.

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25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(716): View more from New York

I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?

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(214): View more from Texas

That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.

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(281): View more from Texas

Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?

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(931): View more from Tennessee

I want to go out and have good clean fun.

(931): View more from Tennessee

Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.

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(850): View more from Florida

but dude how did I get so drunk?

(1-850): View more from Florida

Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"

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