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• (949): View more from California

  Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I need new friends

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• (206): View more from Washington

  He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Umm you met him three days ago....

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I said what I said

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  this is really not the time to pretend we have morals

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• (207): View more from Maine

  traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.

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• (320): View more from Minnesota

  Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.

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  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse

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• (845): View more from New York

  Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.

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• (619): View more from California

  I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.

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• (718): View more from New York

  Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can

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