Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
