i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize