I'm gonna have a badass scar
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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