i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize