Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
