his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
