I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
