you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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