The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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