You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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