actually, I'm a sock model
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
