After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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