the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize