Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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