This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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