I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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