me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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