She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize
