I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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