Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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