i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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