My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize