so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
