WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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