Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
