My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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