it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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