I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I could fuck to npr.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
