i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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