Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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