Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize