He is an equal opportunity slut.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
