You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i would punch a child for taco bell
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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