I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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