That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
