he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
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