I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize