I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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