I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
